How to Let Go of What Has Been Done to You in the Past

Partho Ghosh
4 min readJul 29, 2021

How do you let go of past hurts and move on? It’s a question many of us ask ourselves every time we experience heartbreak or emotional pain.

It is possible to make a conscious decision to hold on to the past, just as it is possible to make a conscious decision to let go and move forward.

Advice on how to let go

Our ability to feel pain is one thing that unites us as humans. We’ve all been hurt in some way, whether it was physical or emotional. What distinguishes us, however, is how we deal with the pain.

When emotional pain prevents you from healing from a situation, experts have discovered that it’s a sign that you’re not moving forward in a growth-oriented way.

One of the most effective ways to recover from adversity is to take the lessons learned and apply them to future growth and progress. We can become immobilised in painful feelings and memories if we get stuck thinking about what “should have been.”

If you’re trying to move on from a traumatic experience but don’t know where to begin, here are 9 suggestions to get you started.

1. Create a positive mind set to help you overcome your negative thoughts.

Your self-talk can either propel you forward or keep you stuck. In times of emotional distress, having a mantra to repeat to yourself can often help you reframe your thoughts.

Instead of getting stuck in, try repeating a positive mantra and soon you would be able to find a new path in life — one that is beneficial to you.

2. Create a physical barrier

It’s not uncommon to hear someone advise you to keep your distance from the person or situation that’s bothering you.

Creating physical or psychological distance between ourselves and the person or situation can aid in letting go because we don’t have to think about, process, or be reminded of it as often.

3. Work on your own

It’s critical to concentrate on yourself. You must decide whether or not to address the pain you’ve felt. Bring yourself back to the present whenever you think about someone who has caused you pain. Then concentrate on something for which you are grateful.

4. Develop a mindfulness practise.

The more we can bring our focus to the present moment, the less impact our past or future has on us.

When we begin to practise being present, our hurts lose their power over us, and we have more freedom to choose how we want to respond to our lives.

5. Be kind to yourself.

If you find yourself blaming yourself for not being able to let go of a painful situation, it’s time to treat yourself with kindness and compassion.

This entails treating ourselves as we would a friend, practising self-compassion, and avoiding making comparisons between our experiences and those of others.

Hurt is unavoidable, and while we may not be able to avoid it, we can choose to treat ourselves with kindness and love when it occurs,

6. Allow negative emotions to run their course.

Don’t worry if you avoid negative emotions because you’re afraid of them. You’re not alone. In fact. Many people are afraid of emotions like grief, anger, disappointment, or sadness.

People try to shut them out rather than feel them, which can sabotage the process of letting go. These negative emotions are riptide. Allow them to flow out of you… It may necessitate mental health treatment, but fighting them can trap you,

7. Accept the possibility that the other person will not apologise.

The process of letting go will be slowed if you wait for an apology from the person who has hurt you. If you’ve been hurt or are in pain, it’s critical that you take care of yourself, which may entail accepting that the person who has hurt you will not apologise.

8. Practice self-care.

When we’re in pain, it can feel like there’s nothing else to do but hurt. Setting boundaries, saying no, doing the things that bring us joy and comfort, and listening to our own needs first. The more self-care we can incorporate into our daily lives, the more empowered we will feel.

9. Hang out with people who make you happy.

This simple but effective tip can help you get through a lot of pain.

We can’t do life alone, and we certainly can’t expect to get through our pains alone. Allowing ourselves to lean on loved ones for support is such a wonderful way of not only limiting isolation but also reminding us of the good in our lives.

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Partho Ghosh

I am a Freelance Copy and Content Writer. I Write Copy to Help You Deliver Message to Your Clients. I write, fresh and eye-catching content. eastsidewriters.com